Thanksgiving and the winter holidays are often the only times of year when the whole family is in the same room. Between the meals, games and memories, there's also a rare opportunity to talk about something that matters: making sure everyone's wishes are known and protected.



Estate planning isn't the easiest dinner-table topic. But a calm, caring conversation now can spare your family confusion, conflict and court costs later. At National Legal Solutions Center, we help families across Michigan and beyond turn these conversations into a plan. Here's how to get started.

Why the Holidays Are a Good Time to Talk

According to Caring.com's 2025 Wills and Estate Planning Study, only 24% of Americans have a will, down from 33% in 2022. The most common reason people give is simply that they haven't gotten around to it.

The holidays can help change that because:

• Siblings who live in different cities are often together in person
• Parents may be reflecting on the past year and thinking about the future
• Seeing aging parents in person can reveal changes in health or memory that need attention
• The new year is a natural deadline for getting documents in place

Signs It's Time to Have the Conversation

You don't need to wait for a crisis. Consider bringing up estate planning if:

• Your parents don't have a will or trust, or their documents are more than a few years old
• A parent has had a recent health scare, diagnosis or hospital stay
• You've noticed memory issues, missed bills or difficulty managing finances
• There's been a death, divorce, remarriage or new grandchild in the family
• A parent owns a home, business or property in more than one state
• Nobody knows who would make medical or financial decisions in an emergency

If any of these apply, it may also be time to think about elder law planning.

How to Start the Conversation

Avoid bringing it up in the middle of a big holiday meal or in front of the whole extended family. A quiet walk, a cup of coffee the morning after, or a one-on-one moment usually works better.

Lead With Care, Not Money

Frame the conversation around protecting your loved ones, not dividing assets. You might say:

• "I want to make sure we know what you'd want if something ever happened."
• "We just updated our own estate plan, and it made me wonder if your documents are current."
• "If you were in the hospital, who would you want making decisions for you?"

Share Your Own Plan

One of the easiest ways to open the door is to talk about your own planning. When adult children have their own wills, powers of attorney and guardianship designations for their kids, it shows that estate planning is for everyone, not just the elderly.

Listen More Than You Talk

The goal is to understand your loved one's wishes, not to tell them what to do. Ask open-ended questions and give them time to think. It may take more than one conversation.

What to Talk About

You don't need to cover everything at once. Key topics include:

• Wills and trusts: Does a will or living trust exist, and where is it kept? Learn more about living trusts.
• Financial power of attorney: Who would manage finances if a parent couldn't?
• Patient advocate designation: In Michigan, this document names who makes medical decisions when a person can't.
• Long-term care wishes: Would they prefer to stay at home, move in with family or enter assisted living?
• Important documents and accounts: Where are insurance policies, bank information, deeds and passwords kept?
• Beneficiary designations: Are life insurance and retirement account beneficiaries up to date?
• Personal and sentimental items: Are there heirlooms or keepsakes with special meaning?

Why Planning Ahead Matters More Than Ever in Michigan

If a loved one loses capacity without a power of attorney or patient advocate designation, the family may have to petition the probate court for a guardianship or conservatorship. Under Michigan's new guardianship law, which took effect in July 2026, that process now involves even more court oversight. That includes court approval before a guardian can move a loved one to a new home.

Without a will or trust, Michigan's intestacy laws decide who inherits. That may not match what your loved one wanted. Read more about what happens if a loved one dies without a will.

Handling Pushback

It's normal for a parent to resist at first. If the conversation stalls:

• Respect their feelings and try again later
• Suggest a neutral third party, such as an estate planning attorney, to explain the options
• Offer to attend a consultation with them for support
• Point them to helpful resources, like our free downloadable resources or an upcoming estate planning workshop

Frequently Asked Questions

Should all siblings be part of the conversation?
It often helps to include everyone so no one feels left out. However, it's usually best to start with a smaller, private conversation with your parent before involving the whole family.

Can an adult child set up an estate plan for a parent?
No. The parent must make their own decisions and sign their own documents while they have capacity. Adult children can help by encouraging the process, gathering information and attending meetings if the parent wishes.

What if my parent already has a will from decades ago?
An old will may no longer reflect their wishes, family changes or current law. Michigan's power of attorney law also changed in 2024, so older documents should be reviewed by an attorney.

Start the Conversation, Then Let Us Help

The holidays are about family, and protecting your family is one of the most meaningful gifts you can give. Attorneys John J. Donahue, Sarah Dollison and Michael Nahas of National Legal Solutions Center have more than 36 years of experience. They help families in St. Clair Shores, Macomb County and across the country put plans in place with care and clarity.

We offer free consultations in-home, in-office or virtually. Call 855-667-0988 or contact us online to schedule yours. Learn more about our estate planning services.

Disclaimer: This article is for general informational purposes only and is not legal advice. Reading it does not create an attorney-client relationship. Every situation is different, so please consult a qualified attorney about your specific circumstances.